54 lines
5.2 KiB
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54 lines
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<span class="hidden">CLiki - The Dying Programmers</span>
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<div id="content"><div id="content-area"><div id="article-title">The Dying Programmers</div><div id="article">One morning on #lisp we did some mental and creative warm-up by wondering
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how programmers die in their respective programming languages.<p>Alas, of course we know we are immortal, we can't DIE in that sense. But what
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do we do instead when we shuffle off the mortal coil? Here are some hints:<p><emu> "Java programmers don't die. They just throw without catch."<p><Jabberwockey> C programmers don't die either. They segfault.<p>C programmers don't die. They get cast into void.<p><dankna> Basic programmers gosub without return.<p><dankna> What do Lisp programmers do?<p><emu> unwind-protect<p><Jabberwockey> Basic. To boldly goto where no programmer has written code before...<p><emu> Lisp programmers never die; they just call a restart<p><Jabberwockey> APL users don't die either. They get mumified in case anyone ever needs to decipher their programs in the future...<p><emu> Jabberwockey: no that's perl<p><emu> Jabberwockey: actually, not even they could understand what they wrote<p><emu> APLers don't die; they just become another operator<p><Jabberwockey> emu: Haskell users don't die either. They get caught by a guard.<p><emu> nah, they're too lazy to die<p><emu> Lisp programmers get garbage collected...<p><emu> ML programmers are frozen<p><emu> haskellers get curried<p><emu> so do MLers tho<p><dankna> SQL programmers don't die, they just unwind the transaction.<p><Jabberwockey> Prolog users don't die, they get cut<p><emu> they backtrack<p><emu> C++ programmers don't die; they have to read template code forever<p><emu> so finally, Java programmers don't die; they just degenerate into primitive types<p><Jabberwockey> Visual Basic programmers don't die. That's what the MS API is for.<p><emu> Kernel hackers don't die; they panic<p><Jabberwockey> Mozilla programmers will die when they reach version 1.0. In other words: never.<p><Jabberwockey> IRC-using programmers don't die, they just QUIT<p><dankna> "... they just get lost in the netsplit.<p><kt> Bad programmers go on safari in flashy debuggers and are not seen again..<p>Smalltalk programmers don't die, they walkback<p>lispers don't die, for it takes eternity to understand the standard<p>asm programmers can't die, it's not in the instruction set<p><hr>
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